V8ism

"PS9" (PS9) 09/05/2016 at 11:24 • Filed to: a new religion to bring you all to your knees

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Blessed be the hands of the chosen men, what who saw in a lifeless lump of aluminum and steel a vision of power unrelenting, and torque everlasting.

Here I am today, a sinner. Steeped in the treacherous misdeeds of the beige 4 cylinders, as many men are. Blinded by the lies told to us by worldy figures welding powers they posses but clearly have not earned. I am theirs no longer! Save me, holy relics of the golden octal age. Bathe me in your siren songs of the redline. Clense me of my autotragic sins and pull my soul from the infernal depths of the rolla Cor.

I pledge to you now body and flesh. All that I have is yours. All that I may obtain I will tithe to you. By word and deed I am yours now and forever.

By my deeds I honor thee. V8.

CB > PS9 09/05/2016 at 11:42

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Hot take: just because it’s a V8 doesn’t make it good, just because it’s a 4-cylinder doesn’t make it bad. Your church is ruled by a false prophet!

Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap > PS9 09/05/2016 at 11:46

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PS9 > CB 09/05/2016 at 11:51

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LISTEN NOT TO THIS BLASPHEMER! For I witnessed him leaving the wicked temple of the autotragics yesterday, passing out pamphlets echoing the coming dual clutch revolution! Your precious revolution is not but lies and snake oil!

I was once led astray as he is. I too was blinded. But I have seen the beautiful lights; the holy fires burning in all eight cylinders AND I SHALL BE TEMPTED NO LONGER! Begone with you. Pack up your false promises and illusions and leave us be, blasphemer!

CB > PS9 09/05/2016 at 11:58

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Remember that the Church of V8 gave us the V8-6-4 , the Oldsmobile diesels , and 150 horsepower Corvettes, while inline-4s have given us hot hatches and numerous rally cars.

Is either engine perfect? Nope. But both can offer great things.

And DCTs are still not great from what I hear, but yeah, automagics are pretty great.

PS9 > CB 09/05/2016 at 12:08

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More blasphemy. And all you have to offer are relics of the dark era? HA! You’ve nothing to say about the current golden age because we are beset with octal miracles from makers of every cast. Your words, and mine, matter not. New converts are visiting dealer’s lots as we speak, and no matter the maker, the truth of the octal fires will reveal themselves and souls will be saved. Do you honestly believe you can argue against the unrelenting power of the V8? Surely you jest. You would sooner scoop the entire ocean with your hands and extinguish the stars!

Benjamin Rolland > CB 09/05/2016 at 12:15

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I'll take an anemic V8 over a hot 4 because I'm not a pinko commie.

CB > Benjamin Rolland 09/05/2016 at 12:17

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Well then just call me comrade.

CB > PS9 09/05/2016 at 12:18

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Well, apparently the Triton 5.4 shits itself a lot, and that’s pretty recent. The Hemi requires two sets of spark plugs per cylinder, which is stupid. And I’ll take the challenge and extinguish the heck out of some stars.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > CB 09/05/2016 at 13:40

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The LS engines with active fuel management have higher failure rates than the Ecoboost 3.5.